Most first time mums spend a lot of time preparing for childbirth. Ask what their preparation entails and they enthusiastically give details of their pregnancy yoga or health regime, a new diet or birth plan, where they are going to give birth or how baby will sleep once he is home.
But what about mental preparation?
How many women have stopped to really consider how motherhood will differ from their existing lives?
Take working mothers, for example, have they considered how stressful it is not working? As a mother you suddenly have no control over your day. Some women crave a bit of their previous life in order to sustain the new. Consequently many of those who could stay at home, choose to go back to work. Society applauds working mums. Once you are a parent, however, you appreciate how exhausting it is when you are with your kids full-time. Many of these women are forces to be reckoned with: selfless, patient, energetic and resourceful. Yet women struggle with being demoted in Society’s eyes: suddenly the successful career woman is ‘just a mother’. We all know working and being a mum is tough, but who is out there voicing how hard it is to be ‘just a mum’?
When it comes to motherhood, no choices are easy. Most things are either a compromise or come at a cost. Additionally, many choices are burdened with guilt. People don’t often talk about cost and guilt, however, because they only make the weight heavier. I am here to talk about all of it.
I believe that if people prepared as much mentally, as they do physically, for the massive life changes they are about to encounter, there would be many more happy, relaxed first time mothers. No one wants to burst the bubble that comes with planning the perfect birth and imagining the perfect baby. Unfortunately, the biggest shock of all is that there is nothing perfect about any of it. The good news is, however, that there is a lot which is stunning, surprising and life changing in the most incredible ways imaginable.
I look forward to sharing my thoughts and experiences with you. I love motherhood more than I ever thought possible, but if you know what lies ahead it is a hell of a lot easier! I hope my comments will be helpful for those about to embark on this incredible adventure, and will be the source of interesting debate for those who are already on the path.